THE JOURNEY SO FAR

KEY CONCEPTS – FOUNDATIONS

COMMUNICATION

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Relationships are built on communication. Talk to your baby, talk to your partner. Listen too. High/Low is a simple way to check in.

Science has proven that the brain changes with exposure to words. Keep the word count high, keep it varied, use real words. Communication takes two – keep learning the language of baby, which includes sounds, gestures, body tension, and facial expressions.

Progressions covered the power of baby talk (infant directed speech), the serve and return (how back and forth turn taking interactions wire the social brain), and how reading is a great way to bond and grow language. Not many Dad’s read to their kids regularly – here’s your chance for a few extra “dad of the year” points. Get ahead by working to build habits and skills in these early months.

FATHERLY STRESS

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Dads that learn how to manage stress and negative emotion produce more level headed kids. Check yourself, but don’t wreck yourself. The Learning Goal: Notice the Stress, Manage the Stress, Increase Your Capacity to Handle Stress. Quick Tool: Breathe in through the nose, focus on longer exhales. Become the flame that leans into the wind vs the flame that hides in fear of being extinguished.

SENSES

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Baby eyes take about 6 months to perform at the adult level. In the first 6 months of life, High Contrast images and objects can have a significant calming effect on infants and also support early focus and attention. Pro Dad: Dedicate an area/wall to your Daddy Art Gallery.

Windows of opportunity, or sensitive periods, exist for many aspects of human development. The first 6 months are a window of opportunity to engage the senses, specifically the eyes and ears. Make eye contact. Switch up the visual environment. For the ears – explore the range of sounds of humans as well as the sounds of the world around you – with intention.

Of course we have other senses. The scents of the world are just as important as the sights and sounds, if not more important in some instances. Variety is the spice of life. Stop and smell the roses – use scent to wire memories in those moments. Visit the “spice rack” regularly.

MOVEMENT

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As movement progresses, exposure to variety is one of the greatest fertilizers for the developing brain. Tummy time rules the first 8 months, and can be done in so many ways. Help baby unwind, get that head moving, and push pull reach to build muscle tone and spine shape. Movement can also be stimulated by touch – from a baby massage to assisted leg pumps to a variety of textures that build the tactile sense of touch.

Moving daily keeps you in tune with their body and helps spot any issues early. If you have a concern, trust your gut, ask a professional.

ON BEING A DAD

The common thread here is you. None of this works without you. Having a baby isn’t actually about the baby. It’s about the person you get the opportunity to shape. You don’t have to be perfect – perfect doesn’t exist, but you do have to get in there and take fatherhood by the *you know whats.

We realize this might feel a little overwhelming from time to time, especially for busy Dads or traveling Dads to get their time with their kids, but there is great news – It’s not quantity it’s QUALITY that matters!

While the scientific research is still catching up on the changing roles of fathers, a powerful study completed in late 2016 showed this on two levels. First that the QUALITY of the time you spend with your child is more impactful than the quantity. Second, success in fatherhood stems from how you feel you are doing as a parent – how you view your own ability to successfully navigate raising a kid. And best of all – these things can be developed through doing – which gives you skills to then pass on to your kid!

Below is an excerpt on the main conclusion of father involvement in early child-rearing connected to behavioral outcomes of children.

The findings of this research study suggest that it is psychological and emotional aspects of paternal involvement in a child’s infancy that are most powerful in influencing later child behaviour and not the amount of time that fathers are engaged in childcare or domestic tasks in the household. How new fathers see themselves as parents, how they value their role as a parent and how they adjust to this new role, rather than the amount of direct involvement in childcare in this period, appears to be associated with positive behavioural outcomes in children.

Being active in learning about being a dad, then putting that into practice – that’s what gives you true confidence and less feelings of “winging it”. Leaning in builds stronger dads, and stronger dads build stronger kids.

Babies are capable of so much more than many people realize. They have a very high level understanding of things way before they can talk. A ton is going on these first few months for them and a ton is going on with your transition to Dad too. As always – have fun, make it your own, don’t force anything, but DO work yourself through anything that feels uncomfortable (that’s called growth). And if you don’t know how – reach out – we got you.